Let’s face it, motherhood is demanding. It doesn’t matter if you are energized, drained, sad, happy, sick, or well...we are still mothers and our job has no off switch.
Being a mom is wearing many hats, it’s balancing a life that always seems OUT of balance, it is negotiating relationships, teaching our kids, taxiing around town, coordinating...and giving unending love. It’s a lot. And the most important job we will ever have. Tall order, I know.
we are part of nature, we have seasons, ebbs and flows, storms, and sun. The time this is most noticeable...is during the changing of the seasons.
So, what if we are not always on point? What if we are totally off our game and feel pressured by our family and by ourselves to “get it together” to be “super mom” when the last thing we feel is super.
It is so important to remember that we are part of nature...what does this have to do with balancing motherhood? Everything. The thing is, because we are part of nature, we have seasons, ebbs and flows, storms, and sun. The time this is most noticeable, and often overlooked, is during the changing of the seasons.
what does this have to do with balancing motherhood? Everything.
If you can bear with me for a moment and consider Mother Earth. I use this name as a means of honoring the earth and all the life on it. Mother Earth is the ultimate mom. She gives life, she nurtures it, provides for it, allows it to live out its individual course, and grieves it when it’s gone. She creates absolute balance, yet, during the transition of
seasons, the balance fluctuates, things change and can feel unstable.
Just think of how many transitions there are in the seasons...With all of that going on we ARE going to be off our game
This is why people often struggle with increased mental health issues during these times. Solid mental health thrives off routine and consistency. It loves safety and stability. When the seasons begin to transition then our minds can become unstable as they shift with it.
Just think of how many transitions there are in the seasons. The change in light, temperature, foliage and color, activities, clothing, routine...that’s a lot. With all of that going on we ARE going to be off our game, even when the seasons change from winter to spring and spring to summer.
So, applying this to the craziness of motherhood and what to do about it.
First, here is a list of 10 ways that seasons changing from summer to fall can affect us as moms:
We’re less motivated to play or do activities with our kids
Bedtime routines feel more exhausting and we snooze the morning alarm a few extra times
We don’t take time for ourselves for exercise or other things because of kids’ school activities, helping with homework, feeling increasingly tired, loss of daylight, and so on
The dark mornings discourage us from early exercise or getting up for “me time” so we begin to feel more neglected
We feel a twinge of sadness or depression that can make it harder to feel excited or enthusiastic for our kids which can create guilt of frustration within us
We forget more things both because of the increase in obligations and the feeling of depression, which can cause a foggy brain
If you are very creative, you may feel an uptick in energy. This can make us feel frustrated or resentful because we no longer have time for ourselves to do the creative things we love
The kids are indoors more which can cause us to feel overwhelmed or stressed
We may have more negative thoughts about ourselves because we think we “should” be handling things better, this can create shame and frustration, also it could increase depression
If we are exercising less and put on a couple of pounds, this can cause us to feel self-conscious and agitated, making us less patient with the daily challenges of motherhood
This is not an exhaustive list. I’m sure that there are more ways that I’m not thinking of at the moment that could be affecting you.
That’s a lot, though...right?
So now...what to do about it. Here is a list of 5 ways to help get through:
Honor your body’s needs. If you are more tired, if the cold weather makes your bones ache, give your body what it’s asking for...rest. The fall and winter are a time of hibernation, even for us humans. Your body is asking to slow down. It’s okay if you don’t exercise as much as you did in the summer, it’s okay if you don’t get up as early, it’s okay if you’re in bed when the kids are, give yourself permission to let your body do what it naturally wants to do.
Use a guided meditation app. This is a great way to center yourself in the middle of a busy day. Guided meditations can be extremely helpful and, if you have an excessively busy brain, silent meditation is going to feel harder. Guided meditation helps to focus the thoughts, keeps you present and centered in the moment. No need for long periods of meditation. 5 minutes, 10 minutes. Whatever you can fit in and whenever works for you.
Practice a single Yoga posture every day. I usually recommend Mountain Pose or Goddess Pose. Mountain pose generates stillness and stability while Goddess pose expresses energy and power. If you’re not familiar with these, here are links to Mountain Pose and to Goddess Pose. You can hold the pose for just a few moments using deep mindful breathing, or, for Goddess, you can hold the pose or step in and out of it with the rhythm of your breath.
5. Post coping thought affirmations everywhere. This is the video I also linked above that teaches all about coping thoughts, what they are and how to use them. Also, take a look at the picture for some more examples. Post them everywhere, in your car, bathroom, bedroom, etc. If you feel awkward and really don’t want the family to see them, put them in your pants and jacket pockets, in your dresser drawers, on your shelf of the medicine cabinet, etc. This helps so much because, Mama, you’re busy and you probably will forget. That’s totally okay and expected, this is a way to work with your busy life and crowded brain.
I hope this helps bring some light and compassion to what you may be going through. I know that it has helped me immensely to honor the fluctuations of my mind, body, and spirit, no longer having unrealistic expectations or expecting myself to always be a super mom. We are not robots, we are natural living beings that are always going to be changing, cycling, and growing.
Honor you, Mama, for the Divine being that you are...intertwined with all things...you are a Goddess.
"I am so grateful for everyone that visits my blog, I'm just glad that I get to share something that could be helpful along this journey of life. So, thank you for being her...All Good Things"