The Death of a Star...
I came home from Yoga one Sunday afternoon...
I honestly didn’t know anything about Kobe Bryant before he died. I’m sure I heard my husband, father or stepson talk about him many times. Yet, his name, his celebrity, never stayed with me, being far outside my realm of interest.
I came home from Yoga one Sunday afternoon and my husband said, did you hear? Kobe Bryant died in a helicopter crash. My first thought was… who is Kobe Bryant? Then my husband followed up with, he and his 13-year-old daughter died.
Being a psychotherapist, I hear tragic stories every day...
My heart felt heavy at that moment. Father and daughter died together? After that, I found myself on the web, on social media, learning about Kobe and his beautiful daughter, Gianna. I felt sick with sadness. I felt the sorrow of millions of people who adored him. I felt the intense grief of his family, I felt my own sadness for the loss of their lives and the other families that died… families… kids… together… What? John, Keri and Alyssa Altobelli… Christina Mauser… Ara Zobayan… Sarah and Payton Chester… on their way to a basketball game... minutes away… why?
I found myself thinking, 'this just seems wrong, this can’t be...'
Being a psychotherapist, I hear tragic stories every day, just as traumatic as this one… why was this tragedy so much different for me? Why was I struggling so? It took time to sort through my experiences, for me to understand, and subsequently, bring this forward to you.
I am not only a psychotherapist, I am also a lightworker, meaning I am deeply attuned with light, with high vibration, with the spiritual realm. And this is where Kobe’s Bryant’s death felt so complicated and overwhelming. Lightworker or not… I am still human.
Even though I do not view death as an end, I still felt totally reluctant to believe that this man, his beautiful girl, two more children and five more adults, were no longer physically living on earth. I found myself thinking, this just seems wrong, this can’t be. Looking at pictures of these souls, their love for one another clear and sparkling, was painful. Can things like this really happen… like this?
...when a person you love leaves this physical world… it is heart crushing...
Being receptive to the energy of others, I began to realize that what I was experiencing was not only mine, but the grief of millions. I was feeling the country’s resistance to these deaths, I was feeling their doubts, their heartache, their disbelief. I realized that a message was coming through, strong and profound: life is sacred.
This message was reaching more people than just me… its arms were entangled in communities and homes and with individual souls. My heart felt as if it would explode.
We are born, we live here on earth and then our bodies die, and we move on. This process is a difficult one… the whole thing. There is joy at its beginning and heartache at its end. But, this message, life is sacred, means something different.
Their presence here filled an enormous space in the lives of millions...
Death is a sacred moment of transition from this life to our original divine state. A return home. Yet, no matter how enlightened you are, no matter how spiritually awake, when a person you love leaves this physical world… it is heart crushing. Never again, in this current lifetime, will you be able to touch or hold that person. Your relationship with him or her, as you can remember it, has transformed into something that can feel distant, even non-existent.
What I felt strongly through this tragedy was the brilliance that these 9 beings had brought to our earth. Their presence here filled an enormous space in the lives of millions. Their departure does not mean loss, it means transformation into something even more brilliant. Their journey has only ended in one sense and now begins again. The same is for those left living. The journey they were on has now ended and they embark on a new one in the company of grief.
There is no rush. Grief is a confusing and winding road...
What I have felt is an enormous emptiness in the hearts of those mourning. A space that feels bottomless, hopeless, lost. My soul took on their disbelief, their understandable resistance to a sudden and unforeseen transition. Yet the message that has come through is clear; there is now a divine openness for transformation in the hearts of those left on earth.
Death is sacred not only for the one passing on, but for those left in the physical. There is now room available for expansion into the spaces left from those that have died.
While, at first, this can feel impossible, with time, it becomes more believable that you can not only continue living but grow out of the death of a loved one.
This is part of living this journey: being utterly transformed by tragedy.
I ask you, how have you been transformed by tragedy? Have you found yourself crushed under its weight? Have you discovered something within yourself that you never knew was there? Open yourself with curiosity, open yourself to experience the pain and loss with the understanding that a new journey has begun.
There is no rush. Grief is a confusing and winding road. But with open curiosity and the love of others, it is possible to travel this road into a beautiful life possible only because of tragedy.
Sarah is a psychotherapist and life coach in Middleboro, Massachusetts, she offers in person and video chat (tele-health) sessions. Sarah specializes in anxiety, eating disorders & body image, postpartum & women's issues.
If you'd like to schedule a free consultation with Sarah you can contact her at email@example.com